Day 5 of Week 6 The Patriarchs

October 23, 2008
Day 5 of Week 6
Fleeing From Uncle
 
Today's Treasure: Genesis 31: 52
This heap is a witness, and this pillar is a witness, that I will not go past this heap to your side to harm you and that you will not go past this heap and pillar to my side to harm me.
 
I hate conflict!!! It is something that I just do not deal with very well. In my perfect world, there would be no conflict. We would all love the Lord and just want to serve Him in a way that would make us very tolerant of our differences!! Yet, conflict is here to stay. We all deal with it on a daily basis, and it causes so much stress in our lives. I have always done everything I can to avoid conflict. I have found over the years that when I follow the guidelines for personal relationships in the Bible, less conflict comes up in my life. I always try to avoid negative conversation that involves other people, especially when I am angry!!! I truly try to find the best in every situation that comes up. Yet, conflict still finds its way into my life on occasion!! So, we all have to learn to deal with it! In my experience, honesty has become my best friend in conflict. I have learned to honestly communicate my emotions in as calm a manner as I know how. If this doesn't work, then I have learned to just walk away from the situation. Sometimes, there is no resolve. Sometimes people just do not see life from the same set of spectacles. When that happens, you have to just learn that we are not all meant to be close friends with one another. I don't think God expects us to embrace every relationship in our life as a deep and personal relationship. He DOES want us to sincerely love as much as we can. Keep in mind that you can love, even from a distance.  
In today's reading (Genesis 31: 1 – 21), Jacob learns this very valuable lesson in his own life. We found out yesterday that Laban just would not back down from trying to keep Jacob in his grasp. He definitely had an ulterior motive for wanting Jacob among his clan. God recognized that and blessed Jacob enough to allow him all he needed to leave and return to the land of his father. When Jacob received the wealth of blessings from God, the sons of Laban began accusing him of taking advantage of Laban and stealing from his flocks. Jacob noticed that Laban was treating him very different now that Jacob had the wealth and Laban was no longer benefiting from the blessings of God that hovered over Jacob. So, his attitude changed. Don't we all have people in our lives that treat us differently when we have nothing to offer to benefit their lives? Well, this is exactly how Jacob was feeling. So he decided to pack up to leave and head home with his family. He called Rachel and Leah in for a family meeting and explained how hard he tried to please Laban; however, Laban was treating him unfairly and he felt that it was time to go. The women were also witness to the way Laban treated all of them. Leah even pointed out that there was no longer any inheritance for them to receive from their father because his flocks had been reduced so much. So, the women agreed to leave. As a side note, please appreciate the way Jacob handled this with his wives. In his culture, he did not owe Rachel and Leah an explanation for leaving. He did not have to receive their approval for the move. He respected them enough to seek it from them and make them feel respected in this decision. Here they all go, off to the land of Abraham. For some reason, Rachel decides that she is going to run back to daddy's house and steal all of the household gods that belonged to Laban. I assume she wanted protection from them…never mind that her husband was constantly blessed right before her eyes by the ONE TRUE GOD!!!
Laban figures out that Jacob has gone and he immediately takes off after him with people. They overtake Jacob in the country of Gilead and Laban confronts Jacob about their departure. God has already intervened for Jacob and told Laban in a dream that he better not do anything to Jacob. Can you believe he (Laban) has the audacity to ask Jacob why they left without allowing him to have a celebration for them? It's almost as if he thought he could earn some extra brownie points with God if he made up this lie. He seems to not realize that God is an all knowing God. So Jacob explains that he was afraid Laban would take his family away from him if he tried to leave with his knowledge. Laban knows he cannot say anything to Jacob that will harm him. The two have to agree to disagree and go their separate ways.  
There are relationships like this in our lives that we have to agree to let go of. It is so important that we do not walk away with a terrible attitude and dishonor the other person with our words. We must keep in our minds that we are probably just as much of a problem in the relationship as the other person is. It just is not meant for your relationship to be a close, personal one. When this happens, honor the other person with your words and your actions. Keep God between the two of you. If there is ever a time the other person needs help from you, give it. Pray for the other person and love them. Just do not involve yourself in a relationship that requires a lot of daily maintenance. Walk away from the obligations of the relationship, but agree to never cause harm to one another. If you continue in a relationship that is unhealthy, both sides will end up taking part in actions that are ungodly because you will become angry with one another from time to time (probably more often than not). When you become angry, it is very easy to dishonor the other party. So avoid this by loving the other person from a distance and keeping God in between the two of you.
I know all of this is much easier said than done. Remember, that is why God gives us examples in His Word that involve ordinary people like you and me. If you are struggling with conflict that is constant and just too much to handle, turn to the Word of God and seek out the way to handle it. I can guarantee you that, through prayer, God will take you straight to the Scripture He wants you to follow for that particular friendship. Just know that the Word of God is not there to sit on your coffee table and make you look like a "good Christian". The Word of God is alive and well. It is just as effective in our culture as it was in the days of Abraham. Embrace it and use it…it will never steer you wrong!!!
Have a wonderful day, and I love you!
Tiffany